Monday, March 08, 2004

"I'm a prodigal with no way home, I put you on like a ring of gold and run down the aisle" - Derek Webb.

Wow Derek Webb gave such a great concert! I love going to concerts and becoming exposed to the heart behind the music. This is definatly why I am such a fan of Shawn Groves, these guys are awesome christians. To me, amazing lyrics beats hardcore rhythem any day--- yet amazing lyrics and great beats make an unbeated duo :-) Knowing the inspiration of song you are singing gives it so much more meaning.
anyhoo--- i have a severe confession.

I am really struggling with self. I put myself above all things every day, all day. There are so many days that I just don't want to socialize. I bog myself into solitude. I settle for luke warm relationships. When I'm around friends, such as tonight, my words aren't those of a wise man, but instead, they are those of a self-rightous mercenary. I know it too! I feel the conviction so strongly! The words that exit my mouth are harmful and I feel so horrible about it. We are called to serve not as stumbling blocks-- but instead -- those who lift fellow Christians up. We are called to live a life of sacrafice. We need to be crucified inorder to feel and understand The Truth, His Truth, your Messiah's Sacrafice. I live life as a fool would. I live life with so little regards to That which defines me. So many times I turn down the Holy Spirit's Call. I ignore Him in order to remain in broken world.
The truth is, I love, yet I still defile.

I'm pretty excited cuz tommorow i'm joining Rob Adair's Life group!!! I'm gettin plugged into Alder's Gate-- I really feel called to get into the church, and become a part of a network of elder believers.

anyhoo-- Jaehun (eric's international student dude) is a very awesome guy! He's invited eric and myself to let him cook for us and watch movies at his house, How awesome is that man?? This guy is like in his mid 20's hanging out with me! That is so sweet-- he is so interesting.
So yeeeeah... I met another Kanakuk'er today through Katie Thamer-- I'm getting very excited about this summer-- I know God has great plans and I'm battling to prevent it from taking my focus off of the present. He fulfills great plans though me every single day.

ahh well i need some sleep!!! got midterms tommmorow morning.. I would really like to focus on praying for the multitude of trips that are occuring of spring break~ pray for safe travel guys-- ask God to place his hands on the wheel.

(too tired to proof read)
~Forever Forward~

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